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Loving Those Who Are Hard to Love

Loving Those Who Are Hard to Love

Jan 09, 2025

Hey, y’all!

Let’s be honest—loving people who are hard to love is one of the most challenging aspects of the Christian walk. Whether it’s someone who’s hurt us, a difficult coworker, or even a family member who tests our patience, loving them often feels impossible. But Jesus calls us to a higher standard. In Matthew 5:44, He says:

“But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.”

This command isn’t optional, and it’s not just about gritting our teeth and forcing kindness. Jesus invites us to love as He loves, even when it’s hard. Today, let’s explore practical steps for loving our enemies and those who challenge us, and how Christian life coaching can help us navigate this difficult but rewarding journey.

1. Start with Prayer

The first step in loving difficult people is to pray for them. This isn’t always easy, especially when someone has hurt us deeply, but prayer softens our hearts and aligns us with God’s perspective.

Pray for their well-being, for God’s blessings in their life, and for any struggles they might be facing. When we pray for someone, it’s harder to stay angry or resentful toward them. Over time, God uses those prayers to transform not only the other person but also us.

2. Seek to Understand

Often, difficult people act out of their own pain, insecurity, or unmet needs. While this doesn’t excuse bad behavior, understanding their struggles can help us approach them with compassion instead of frustration.

Ask God to help you see them through His eyes. A Christian life coach can also guide you through this process, helping you develop empathy and find ways to respond with grace instead of reacting out of hurt or anger.

3. Set Healthy Boundaries

Loving someone doesn’t mean allowing them to walk all over you or tolerate abuse. Jesus Himself set boundaries, often stepping away from crowds to rest or rebuking those who acted unjustly.

Healthy boundaries protect your heart while still allowing you to love others. A Christian life coach can help you identify where boundaries are needed and give you tools to maintain them in a loving but firm way.

4. Choose Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a crucial part of loving those who are hard to love. It’s not about condoning their actions or forgetting the pain they caused; it’s about releasing the hold that resentment has on your heart.

Ephesians 4:32 reminds us, “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” When we forgive, we reflect God’s grace and make room for healing in our own lives.

5. Love Through Actions, Not Just Words

Loving difficult people often requires tangible expressions of kindness. Small acts of service, encouraging words, or simply being patient in challenging moments can make a big difference.

Romans 12:20 says, “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.” These acts of love might not change the other person immediately, but they reflect Christ’s love and may open the door for reconciliation over time.

6. Remember the Ultimate Example

Jesus is our model for loving those who are hard to love. He loved us when we were still sinners (Romans 5:8) and extended grace to those who betrayed, denied, and crucified Him. When we struggle to love others, we can draw strength from His example and ask the Holy Spirit to help us love as He does.

Practical Steps for Loving Difficult People

  • Daily Prayer: Commit to praying for the person who challenges you, asking God to bless them and transform your heart.
  • Reframe the Situation: Instead of focusing on their faults, ask God to show you how He sees them.
  • Take One Small Step: Show kindness in a simple, practical way—a smile, a compliment, or a helping hand.
  • Seek Support: Work with a Christian life coach to explore strategies for loving difficult people and maintaining healthy relationships.
  • Forgive Regularly: When old wounds resurface, choose to forgive again and again, relying on God’s strength to do so.

Challenge for Today: Think about someone in your life who’s difficult to love. What’s one small step you can take to reflect Christ’s love to them today? Whether it’s a prayer, an act of kindness, or a word of encouragement, commit to showing them the love that Jesus has shown you.

Loving difficult people isn’t easy, but it’s one of the most powerful ways we can reflect God’s love to the world. With the help of prayer, the Holy Spirit, and resources like Christian life coaching, we can grow in this area and make a lasting impact in our relationships and communities.

Blessings to you all! See you tomorrow!