When thinking about what God wants to give you, it may be that we get things backwards.

God is the giver of all good and perfect gifts. He’s the source of everything. He’s the “uncaused cause” – nothing exists apart from Him. Nothing will come your way unless He sends or allows it.

Some days, I wonder if I have a grasp on this praying thing.

I’ve used all sorts of “formulas” to make my prayer life vibrant and intimate. I’ve been taught to hit all my marks. I’m supposed to have certain elements of prayer. You know – adoration, confession, thanksgiving, and supplication. Praise. Confess sins. Be grateful. Pray for others. Pray for myself.

Know what? All these are critically important. You don’t want to camp out on just one component – your prayers shouldn’t be all me-centered, for example.

Which brings me back to my original thought – what is it that God wants to give you? Are there certain steps I need to take in order for Him to grasp what it is that I want and need?

You’ll have to determine for yourself what kind of prayer life you desire.

I’m so scared of my time alone with God becoming rote or routine. It needs to be authentic.

So if you’re of a mind to pray, the question is – is it about you or Him?

If you’ve prayed for something today, I can’t tell you what He’ll give you. That’s His call, and it’s one I can’t counsel Him on, if you catch my drift.

But He will give.

There’s one thing I can assure you that He’ll give you: He’ll give you Himself.

That’s a staggering thought.

Here’s what God loves to do: He loves to pour Himself into you. Problem is, we can’t sit still long enough to receive it.

And – and this is huge – when He pours Himself into you, it isn’t always pleasant or easy.

When God grips you, when He wants to give you His nature, there’s a significant change that He offers.

The reality is this, and it’s something you might not have prayed for.

You will weep over your sin and disobedience.

I can attest to this. There have been times when I’ve approached God in prayer, expecting just a sweet little devotional time. You know, that little boost to start my day.

And then – BOOM! Ka-POW! My quiet time is anything but quiet. Figuratively, it’s like God has wrestled me to the ground, straddled my chest, poked His holy finger in my face and said, “Tony? C’mon. Are you kidding me? How can you tolerate the crap in your life?” (I don’t know if God would say “crap,” but you get the idea.)

That’ll break ya.

And that’s what God wants to give you. He wants to give you Himself so that you’ll understand just what it is in your life that keeps Him from being Lord.

You don’t make Jesus Lord. He already is. We just need to acknowledge that.

Bottom line? You’ll have no peace until you’ve done the wise thing.

What God wants to give you may be far removed from what you wanted. And that’s okay. Actually, it’s a necessity.

So. Pray without ceasing. Present your requests to God. As it pleases Him, He may answer your prayers in a way that satisfies what you asked for.

But no matter what His answer on those specific prayers, whether they be for you or someone else, know this:

You’ve got all of Him. He just wants all of you.

Today’s blog post will be short and sweet, like the old woman’s dance.

If you’re suffering now, you don’t have to pretend it’s all good.

I’m not sure what constitutes suffering. It’s an emotionally-charged word, but I think it can be too easily applied.

Your DVR not working is not suffering. Running out of mayonnaise and having to go to the store isn’t suffering.

Starving to death is suffering. Stage 4 cancer is suffering.

And a totally trashed relationship with no reconciliation on the horizon might be suffering.

The uneasy truth is that we all suffer. Every one of us. All of us. You aren’t exempt.

There is a line of thought in some Christian circles that suffering is needless. That if you pray right, live right, and “obey the rules,” then you’re exempt. Just have a positive mental attitude. God wants you to be spared from hurt, right?

And when suffering does occur, then we’re supposed to pretend like it’s all good.

Uh, nope. I don’t think the call is to suffer and then automatically say, “Well, praise God!”

I’m looking at Jesus here. There’s the savior in the Garden of Gethsemane, facing in mere hours ahead the worst conceivable suffering imaginable. Torture. Crucifixion. Abandonment by friends. Abandonment by God.

I didn’t see Him singing in the garden. I don’t see Him acting all hyperspiritual. I see Him hurting out loud. I see Him sweating blood. I see Him asking His Father for a way out.

Is there a lesson here?

In full disclosure, I don’t think I’ve actually ever really suffered. Sure, I’ve had some tough times, and if you’re familiar with my testimony from the last couple of years, there have been plenty of challenges. But outright suffering? Not really, at least not to the extent that Christ experienced. And there are plenty of other scriptural accounts of godly folks facing excruciating trials. Some persevered. Some didn’t end well.

You have to write your own autobiography for this one. You have to ruthlessly evaluate yourself and be honest – have you really suffered? To what extent? And how did you respond?

I can’t answer those questions for you. You’ll need to hammer those out.

Jesus unquestionably suffered. But at the end, He went to the cross with joy.

On the surface, there sure isn’t anything joyful about that.

However, dig a little deeper. What Christ experienced, and His response to it, was not a shallow consolation that knew no pain. Rather, His was a joy deepened by sorrow while recognizing the hurt of humanity.

Here’s my takeaways. I’d love for you to develop your own. It will salve your soul:

• You are going to suffer.
• A reasonable question would be, “To what end?” In other words, how can you learn and grow through it?
• How you respond to suffering literally impacts the quality of your life.
• You can choose your response.
• Choose wisely.
• There is a purpose in suffering. God could engineer circumstances so that we never experienced any hurt. But He doesn’t.
• Since He’s God, He knows what He’s doing.
• Furthermore, He loves you insanely, and it’s in the context of that love that He allows that pain.
• Big closing question: Jesus experienced joy. Maybe He even chose joy. So to what purposeful, positive end can you allow your suffering to make a difference not only in your own life, but in the lives of others? Gnaw on that one.

This is a tough one, but it’s worth taking some time to ponder.

As I write this, I’m in the waiting room at the surgical area of Baptist for Women, at Baptist Hospital in Jackson, Mississippi. My sweet wife Teresa is back in the bowels of the hospital somewhere having her shoulder replaced – a nice metal ball plugged into a nice plastic socket. The doc says she’ll be better than new … she’s been quietly suffering for weeks now. It was time to get this done. By the time you read this, it may be over and done. Pray anyway – for a quick, uneventful recovery and that I can be the very best caregiver ever!