3 Ways To Get Unstuck
Are you stuck and need to be unstuck?
Here’s what I mean about needing to be “unstuck.”
It may be that in these challenging days you feel like you’re mired in some mudhole. You can’t budge. Your mindset stinks. Your environment is holding you captive. You’re stuck in a pandemic, in a dead-end job, in a toxic relationship, and you are trying to figure out how to get unstuck with grace and integrity. You have to move on. You need to grow.
You’re worn out. You are stuck, and there doesn’t seem to be any way to get unstuck, moving, and growing.
The thing is – life doesn’t stand still. You are either growing or decaying. You are either stuck (which means you need to get unstuck) or moving along.
As I type, I’m looking at a plant in a window. It’s a little succulent. It’s something I’ve managed not to kill.
That little thing is growing. There are a couple of flowers on it. That excites me. But I’m aware that it has a lifespan, like all living things, and one day it’ll just die.
So here you are, at some point in your life journey, and you are either growing or decaying. Let’s call it “maturing.”
You may find yourself stuck – morally (you have some vile habit you haven’t been able to shake), intellectually (your mind takes you to some unhealthy places, and it’s because you won’t open yourself up to other thoughts and possibilities), physically (I won’t go there, other than to note that I don’t need to see a plate of cookies laying around), spiritually (you are distant and isolated from God, and nothing seems to help), or relationally (you’re struggling in a personal relationship, or at least know it isn’t where it needs to be.)
You feeling me?
What, then, can you do to get unstuck? How can you free yourself from the grip of fear, isolation, unease, fatigue, or something else? I mean, dang, this COVID stuff. I’ve decided that everyone is gonna get it at some point. It’s just a matter of severity.
Fact is, getting unstuck is ultimately an act of God. But you can position yourself to let God do all the heavy lifting.
Here are three thoughts.
1. If you want to get unstuck, then you have to keep the end in sight.
Christians tend to get this backwards. These days, frequently, I say “Come, Lord Jesus!” I mean that. But heaven isn’t my goal. It’s my destination. There is a difference. My goal is to become more like Jesus, not to end up in heaven.
The implications are pretty significant. If the goal (the end) is to be like Jesus, I need to take purposeful, intentional steps in that direction.
Again, Christ does the heavy lifting. He puts me and you in situations, struggles, and relationships that stretch us. That might not be pleasant at the time. His desire is for us to be like Him, and He has tons of tools at His fingertips to grow us and get us unstuck from whatever place we find ourselves.
The end, then, is Christlikeness. That’s why what is happening to you is happening.
2. To get unstuck, you have to commit to being unstuck.
Some people seem pretty content in the place they’re in. It’s a weird thing. People hang out with others who drag them down. They embrace a habit that is causing harm. They purposefully read and expose themselves to things that make them feel awful because they’re looking for “the truth.”
No way do you need to be that person. Me either.
It’s a commitment thing, and that isn’t easy. Sorry. No quick fix.
When I perform a wedding, and do the vows, some of the traditional phrases are “for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health,” etc. What I’m saying is “Y’all are making a lifelong commitment. It’ll be hard. It doesn’t matter if it’s hard. You’re going to work through everything.” The couple has no idea what’s coming. They just go for it.
You’ll get stuck from time to time. But before you get stuck, you need to commit to get unstuck. It doesn’t matter what the sticking place is. The decisions are made before you get stuck. You forbid yourself to stay there.
As an aside, the trick is to trust God. Obvious, right? You place your life in His hands, no holding back, and you die to your own agenda and goals. I’ll just bet most of our getting stuck has to do with us taking matters into our own hands instead of seeking His will and yielding to it.
3. People who are stuck should value the process of getting unstuck as much as the state of being unstuck.
That quick fix I mentioned earlier? We’re always looking for those ten easy steps to … whatever.
Got an unpleasant truth for you. Most growth (or getting unstuck) doesn’t happen in one whack. It tends to be a process rather than an event.
I’m not discounting those times when you had a major breakthrough. God used a speaker, an incident, a book, or other definitive point in time to completely realign your life and keep you moving and growing.
My experience is that change comes in the tiny incremental decisions I make. My prayer, for instance, is “just for today, Lord, help me not to be stupid.” It’s not a one-and-done thing. It’s a journey.
I believe the secret to getting unstuck is bound up in our daily routines. I’ve written plenty of times about the personal necessity I have of spending time along with God daily. I can face a day having no idea what it holds, but I can by-golly control those first few minutes.
The constant is that God shows up every morning. The rest of the day just unfolds as it will.
This won’t affect your final grade, but if I were giving a challenge or assignment, it would be for you to identify that one simple step you can take to get unstuck from whatever is bogging you down, and dealing with it.
In other words – determine what it is you need to do to get unstuck, and do it.
It’s not like crossing the Alps. It’s that baby step.
Talk later!