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“When You Wish Upon a Star” just happens to be my favorite Disney song. It’s even the ringtone on my iPhone. Pathetic, right?

I don’t want to overanalyze why this song appeals to me so. It probably has to do with fulfilled dreams, wishes granted, and the whole ethos of “happily ever after” which is a hallmark of the Disney classics.

If only.

Maybe you think you just can’t catch a break. You reflect on your past and feel sorrow. You look toward the days ahead and wonder.

Some people are resigned to their lot in life. They call it “fate.” That’s Jiminy Cricket’s thought, isn’t it? “Fate is kind,” he sings.

If you buy into the concept of fate, then you’ll see that Mr. Cricket is way too optimistic. The thought is we are one tiny cog in a huge cosmic machine. Stuff happens. We rage against the machine. Sometimes we prevail. Sometimes we get hammered.

I heard a quote by the famous psychiatrist and psychoanalyst Carl Jung that, no matter what your opinion of this gentleman is, is something to consider:

Until you make your unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.

Whew, babe. That’s some heavy stuff.

The implication of what Dr. Jung said is this: There are all sorts of subconscious undercurrents flowing in our mind that affect how we see the world, how we act, even how we think. As long as they stay buried and unexamined, they will continue to affect us, and we won’t have a clue as to why we do and say the things we do.

There is, then, no such thing as fate, according to Jung. The things that happen in our life are basically our own creations. The consequences in our lives are primarily of our own doing.

Obviously, if a tornado destroys your house, you didn’t have anything to do with that. It isn’t your fault. But how you respond to it and others involved is a choice you make. What might be kicking around in your unconscious will manifest itself in your thoughts and behavior. Make sense?

“Fate” is a convenient excuse for us to not take responsibility.

• “But you don’t know my parents. You don’t know what kind of home I grew up in.”
• “Look at where I was born and where I grew up.”
• “Look how my husband treats me.”
• “My algebra teacher was  lousy.”
• “I didn’t choose to look this way.”
• “I didn’t have any say-so over my genetics.”

And so forth. See where I’m going with this?

Here are three thoughts that put a nail in that “fate” coffin:

1. There is always, always, always personal responsibility. You got issues? Challenges? Feel like the world is against you? First, always first, evaluate yourself. I totally believe about 98% of the grief  we experience is self-inflicted. Keep that victim card in your deck. Better yet, discard it entirely.
2. There is personal awareness. Look back at that Jung quote. This is about making the unconscious conscious. Unless you are totally tapped in to your reptilian brain stem, you are aware of what you are thinking, what you’re doing, what you’re experiencing. It’s like the guy who complained about being overweight. He blamed genetics, glandular problems, all that. I hated to tell him, but no one ever ate anything accidentally. (That could almost be autobiographical, but I am acutely aware when I’m playing the glutton.) So personal awareness … it’s taking yourself off autopilot and engaging in the world around you and inside you. I think social media has a lot to do with a lack of personal awareness, but there may be another blog topic there.
3. And there is clarity. It’s one thing to know who you are and why you behave the way you do, but clarity on the issue leads to transformation. It’s so simple, conceptually … take responsibility for what you are, be aware of what you’re doing, and the clarity you get leads to transformation.

You’ll have to come up with your own standards of what “transformation” means for you. For me, it’s nothing less than life-change. A renovation of myself. Because, God help us all, we carry around so much junk and baggage.

Embrace discontent. Realize you are responsible for the state you’re in. At the least,  personal awareness will bring you to the point of being real and authentic with yourself. Then there’s clarity – and I should say that being clear about who you are and why you’re the way you are can be scary.

That realization of the essence of you is the first step in transformation.

Want that? Want to move forward and put all the junk behind?

Ancient script says, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”**

The Apostle Paul grasped this truth 2000 years ago. It all begins in your mind.

Change your thinking, and you change your life. You are what you think about.

* Writer/s: Leigh Harline, Ned Washington
Publisher: BOURNE CO.
Lyrics licensed and provided by LyricFind

**Romans 12:2