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Am I of any use? Have you ever asked yourself that?

This is the tendency I’ve been dealing with in recent days.

If I am to be of any use, I have to “produce” or “perform,” right?

People talk about seasons of life. I know I’m still “Tony,” however you want to interpret that. I also know that every day I’m closer to being old.

With my lifelong tendency to spend way too much time inside my own head, I’ve found myself asking myself that question over and over: “Am I of any use?” Maybe that’s just part of the aging process. I dunno.

There have been reams written about “leaving a legacy,” “making a mark,” “impacting others,” and so forth. Well, since most days I struggle to put on my pants without losing my balance, “leaving a legacy” is often not a high priority.

Still, I’d like to think I made a difference. And I can honestly say that it’s not about me. If there has been positive change from me being on the scene, I don’t even care if folks remember my name. I strive to keep my ego in it’s proper place, like locked away in some dungeon.

I wrote all that. It looks good. Now for the reality.

Sometimes we (I?) think God can’t get by without us.

It’s called being an “assistant to the Holy Spirit.” You know – you have to be available to pick up the ball if God fumbles it. If He’s not responding to a need the way you think it needs to be responded to, then you have to take up the slack.

There may be a byproduct to this – if we are busy about serving the Lord, then we feel better about ourselves.

I have to tread carefully here, but we can be doing God’s work for reasons not exactly honorable. If it becomes about us, then we’re about to get in deep taffy.

So – are you of any use? It’s matter of motives.

If we get all concerned about God “using” us for some great task, we tend to focus our eyes on ourselves, and we become overly concerned about how we walk and talk and act.

This may just be a Tony thing. You’re saying, “That’s fine, Uncle Tony. But that isn’t where I’m living.”

I’m saying we should stop asking “Am I of any use?” and accept the fact that we aren’t of much use to Him.

Here’s the truth:

The issue is not that of being of any use but of being of value to God Himself.

Read that again.

Once we are totally surrendered to God He will work through us all the time.

See what that does for us? The pressure is off. I am useful.

We just need to stop trying to perform.

God’s not impressed.

Be blessed.